“The Secret”

Posted by: admin  :  Category: Neuro Semantics, NLP, Personal Development

Do you work out? Are you a gym member? If your answer is yes, then like me, you may have noticed a rather common phenomenon at the gym. Out of 100 folks who work out, perhaps only 3 to 10 seem to make physical changes that could be seen as evidence of their efforts. This could either be weight loss, muscle gain or both. Have you noticed this?  The statics indicate that perhaps only 5% – 10% of folks will realize their fitness outcomes even if they hire a personal trainer.  The question that intrigued me is this, what separates the 5% or 10% from the 90% to 95%’s? Is there a secret to their success and is this secret applicable to other areas of life, be it work, family, social or even spiritual based activities?


Is there a secret? “The Secret”? 



If you visit most book stores, you’ll come across a large “literature buffet” that offers the secret or the keys that will get you into the 5% or 10% club. From quantum physics to “the secret” of using the law of attraction, from “proven and guaranteed” diet plans to scientific exercise regimes that promise “little or no pain but plenty of gain” or “zero – effort ways to look ripped” for the busy modern day urbanite; all of them seemingly possessing the secret.

Is that the secret?


Walk into any drug or heath food store and you’ll see shelves of products, from creams to meal replacements and supplements, which claim to hold the secret within them. All one needs to do is to purchase and consume. It’s really that simple, the rest will be taken cared of by the “secret ingredients” in the product. 


Is this the secret?


Visit most exercise equipment stores and you are bound to see “amazing gadgets and massagers” that will deliver the secret to you. All one needs to do is to purchase and use. It could be as comfortable as wearing a “belt” around ones waist or standing or sitting on a “violently” vibrating machine.      


Is that the secret?


Open the newspaper or simply take a drive down town and you’ll see “specialized centers” that will “apply the secret” on you. Yes, that’s right. Simply sign on, walk in, jump on to a comfortable bed and doze off to sleep. The rest will be taken cared of by “the agents of the secret” who, after 38 sessions or so, will deliver amazing results. Just look at the proven testimonies of the “before” and “after” photos. 



Is this the secret?


The question is this, “Is the secret a “bike”, a “diet formula”, a “secret weight loss and muscle gain ingredient”, a “massage belt”, a “book”, a “treatment centre” or a “specialized training program”, etc.? If the secret any one of these, then we can be sure of one thing, they were available and was used by a significant number of folks in the 90% club who achieved minimal or near zero results. Or they may have attained some results but soon gained back all the weight they had lost.


So what’s the secret? While all the elements mentioned above can assist, the real secret is between ones ears; its ones attitude and Neuro Semantics about achieving the set outcome: weight loss and muscle gain. This separates the 10% from the 90%!  



Let’s first start by defining the word attitude. The origin of the word “attitude” is traced to the Latin word “aptitudo” meaning “fitness” and is directly linked with the word “aptitude.” Aptitude is defined as an inclination, a tendency and capacity for learning. Hence attitude is associated with posture; our physical, mental and emotional posture towards a certain fact or situation. In this case, weight loss, muscle gain, looking attractive and sexy, feeling energetic and confident.


Now this is directly link with ones Neuro Semantics, which are the meanings, the internal references and frame of mind that we have towards a certain fact, situation or outcome; in this case being weight loss, muscle gain, looking attractive, feeling energetic and confident. Our inner meanings, beliefs and conclusions, our Semantics, is what we take as being “real” inside us which in turn leads us to experiences it as being “real” in our entire neurology, hence the term Neuro Semantics. This then produces the corresponding state which produces the resulting behavior. In a nut shell then, the secret is all about this “inner game” of ours which then gets translated into our “outer game” which is our actions, behaviors and habits that “makes real” our intended outcomes.


“In life there are two games. It doesn’t always seem that way. It seems that there is only one game – the outer game, the game of what we do, our achievements, our performances, our actions, whether we hit a home run and celebrate with the winning team, or limp off the field in defeat. Actually, above and beyond the outer game is the inner game where the real action takes place.”

- L. Michael Hall Ph.D, “Winning the Inner Game”


To the degree that we have rich and robust meanings that are constantly refreshed and then translated into behavior which then gets fed back and reinforces our inner game, the more we produce the actions and habits that “makes real” our outcomes.  This feed back and feed forwarding dynamics between our inner and outer game drives performance, sustains effort, helps us develops flexible strategies in order to perform our highest and best intentions. On the other hand, when we have weak and poor meanings, our inner game, to that extent will we produce weak and poor behavior, our outer game which then gets fed back and reinforces our weak inner game.


“All of our outer games of performance are determined by our inner game of our mental and emotional frames.”

- L. Michael Hall Ph.D, “Winning the Inner Game”


The chart below, which is called aptly called the Meaning and Performance Axes, clearly illustrates this point. 


Peak performance which is performance that actualizes ones highest and best intentions, potential and abilities is at QUABRANT 4, HIGH MEANING, HIGH PERFORMANCE, where one has rich and robust meanings that are translated into right behavior and actions. Here the right physical, emotional and mental “posture”, the right attitude, exists towards the outcome: getting physically fit, attractive, energized and looking attractive which is “muscled” into the right physical activities and behaviors, nutritional plan and rest. These habits, strategies and tactics are bolstered by empowering beliefs, meanings and values which produce peak performance and sustain meaningful and consistent effort. This is the zone of the 5% to 10% club! 


At QUADRANT 1 we have LOW MEANING, LOW PERFORMANCE, where poor meanings get translated into poor behavior and actions. Here strategies and tactics are poor and inferior and are poorly executed because they are bolstered by disempowering beliefs, weak meanings and values. One has no interest and weak self beliefs in ones ability and worth to get fit, sexy, energized and healthy. Excuses are made to hide this “internal reality”: “I’m not the exercising kind”, “I was born this way”, “O, I have tried all this fads before, and they do not work.”     


QUADRANT 3, HIGH MEANING, LOW PERFORMANCE, is the zone where one has rich meanings, values and intentions but is plagued by low performance because of weak and outdated strategies and tactics. Here practical “know how and how to” is needed. The classic case of individuals who have big dreams and plans but with little execution and “realization” of them simply because they do not knowing what practical steps to take to perform their higher intentions. Or the individual who have the best of intentions and plans buy has weak “execution muscles”, meaning that no action takes place. The classic example being folks who make resolutions at the turn of the New Year but hardly ever have a action plan or strategy and hence never quite get to the starting line of execution.     


QUADRANT 2, LOW MEANING, HIGH PERFORMANCE, is the zone where one is active and industrious in taking tireless action but lacks the rich meanings and beliefs to generate meaningful performance, which is peak performance. The “why” or the motivation behind performance is weak and poor and this leads to meaningless behavior, burn out and eventual failure. The classic example being the proverbial “hamster athlete” or individual who is busy with activity but who don’t seem to be going anywhere and suffers from meaningless activity.        



The secret lies in QUADRANT 4. In HIGH MEANING: in ones rich Neuro Semantics, in ones positive physical, emotional and mental “posture” towards fitness and well being, ones INNER GAME. And in HIGH PERFORMANCE: the making real of the inner game, the execution of ones Semantics in ones entire Neurology through right strategy and tactics. This then get fed back into ones inner game and reinforces and validates ones the rich meanings which then get fed back into ones Neurology through further action and behavior. It is this dynamic feed back and feed forwarding self reinforcing loop that produces consistent and persistent behaviors that turn into habits that help make real the outcome – this being peak performance.



“As goes your inner game, so goes your outer game.”

- L. Michael Hall Ph.D, “Winning the Inner Game”



What is your Neuro Semantics about getting fit, looking sexy, working out, feeling energized and gaining confidence? What is your physical, emotional and mental “posture”, your attitude, toward getting a fit and attractive body? What’s your Neuro Semantics about being able to wear attractive clothing and feeling good about yourself in public while “turning heads”?


How are you referencing the energizing activity and behavior of working out, stretching, dancing, having active fun exercising and generating a good sweat that invigorates and produces restful sleep every night?


What are your meanings behind food? Is food for comfort or for fueling the body to enable it to remain active, energized and healthy in order to serve your highest and best intentions?


Can you visualize yourself looking, feeling and sounding fitter and attractive while hearing the positive comments of others and the looks admiration that you’ll get?


Do you feel that you are worth it? Would you like to own your God given powers to think, feel, speak and behave, as well as exercise your POWER OF CHOICE, to act in ways that will enable you to realize your best physical, emotional and mental self?      


You may now go ahead and review your Neuro Semantics, your current frames of mind and meanings (Meaning here is not about “knowing” which what mere intellectual knowledge is. It’s about but your beliefs, conclusions, judgments, understandings, presuppositions, decisions, etc. that makes things “real” inside your Neurology), about the above by simply reviewing the questionnaire below:



When we loose meaning or experience deterioration in our Neuro Semantics, our attitude, our INNER GAME, we can drop into either quadrant 1 or 2. Alternatively when we lack the muscle to execute our inner meaning, our INNER GAME, we drop into quadrant 3.


“Men are not disturbed by things, but their estimate of things.”

- Marcus Aurelius


Now we’ll look at some examples of successful athletes and model their QUADRANT 4 Neuro Semantics to help us produce QUADRANT 4 attitudes and behaviors.      


Sir Steven Redgrave: He won 4 Olympic Gold Medals in the coxless pair (1988 Seoul, 1992 Barcelona, 1996 Atlanta, 2000 Sydney) and 1 in the coxed four (1984 Los Angeles):


“At the start of my career I had a belief that I could be one of the world’s best rowers. There wasn’t a lot of evidence behind that but I went into my career with this belief that I could win races and that carries you a long way…….. But you have to reinvent yourself every time because staying at the same level isn’t going to be good enough.”

(Source: Men’s Fitness, September 2011)


Here we see evidence of QUADRANT 4 qualities; HIGN MEANING, his belief that he could be “one of the world’s best rowers” which was real in his Semantics and HIGH PERFORMANCE, the performance of this in his Neurology through action. At the same time we see the dynamic feed back and feed forwarding self reinforcing loop between his Inner and Outer Game that produced consistent and persistent behaviors that turned into habits that “made real” his outcome, winning 5 Olympic Gold Medals.


  • What new beliefs and meanings can you have about getting fit and working out?
  • What new beliefs about yourself, your worth, your abilities and capability to get fit, look amazing and feel physically confident can you develop as “evidence” to produce the right behaviors?


Daley Thompson: He won 2 Olympic Gold Medals in the decathlon (1980 Moscow, 1984 Los Angeles).

“I never considered what I did as being highly pressured. I loved every moment at the big competitions. It was where I felt most at home….Enjoy it.”

(Source: Men’s Fitness, September 2011)


Evidence of Quadrant 4 qualities: His attitude towards his sport, the training he put in and competing at the highest level. These rich meanings, HIGH MEANING, produced peak performance in training and in competition, his outer game, HIGH PERFORMANCE! It made his fitness regime and competing enjoyable!

  • What new empowering meanings and beliefs can you frame regarding working out?
  • Can you make them fun and enjoyable?  Can you infuse working out with a sense of excitement, experimentation, variety and play?    


 Chris Boardman: He won an Olympic Gold Medal (1992 Barcelona) in the individual pursuit and a Bronze Medal (1996 Atlanta) in the 52km time trial.

You can have the best physical capability in the world but if you can’t perform at a given moment then you’re not going to maximize your potential. I boiled it down to – and it sounds cheesy – not actually trying to win an Olympic gold medal but just trying to be as good as I could be.”

(Source: Men’s Fitness, September 2011)


Evidence of Quadrant 4 qualities: His HIGH MEANING of simply wanting to be the best that he could be, to actualize his full potential, stretching and grow produced HIGH PERFORMANCE. This is the secret of the QUADRANT 4 attitude and Neuro Semantics, approaching anything with the highest intention of actualizing ones fullest potential! 


  • What new meaning can you frame about your purpose and intention of working out, getting fit, healthy, confident and attractive?
  • Can it simply be about being the best that you can be, actualizing your full physical potential while doing away with excuses or trying “to be like” someone else?


Lord Sebastian Coe: He won 2 Olympic Gold Medals in the 1,500 (1980 Moscow, 1984 Los Angeles) meters and 2 Olympic Silver Medals in the 800 meters (1980 Moscow, 1984 Los Angeles).


“It’s about maintaining extraordinary levels of focus for when it matters, then begin able to switch off, and then switch on again.

Nothing in sport happens overnight. And there are days when you just do things that you have to do. Road work at 6.30 in the morning……but it’s what you have to do if you want to win medals.”

(Source: Men’s Fitness, September 2011)


Evidence of Quadrant 4 qualities: His HIGH MEANINGS about performing when “it matters” in order to produce HIGH PERFORMANCE. This is coupled with his ability of being able to switch off to relax, attend to other matters and live a balanced life.


His attitude about the “process” of becoming a world class athlete, the patience it would require, the journey as “nothing…happens overnight” and the attitude of “just doing it” even on difficult days is driven by his rich meanings about his outcome that produced in him persistence, resilience, discipline, flexibility, etc. This produced the winning habits of peak performance.


  • What new meaning can you attach to working out that will produce in you the drive to create a sense of “focused – ness” when its time to work out as well as a sense of being balanced, knowing when to switch off and avoid excessiveness?
  • What rich meaning about your highest intentions and purpose for getting fit and healthy can you form to help you embrace “weight loss and getting fit and attractive” as a journey and process?
  • What rich meanings about your highest intentions and purpose for getting fit and healthy can you form to help you develop the qualities of discipline, resilience, persistence and flexibility to help you “just do it” and “keep on doing it” even on challenging days?      


 Jonathan Edwards: He won an Olympic Gold (2000 Sydney) and Silver Medal in the triple jump (1996 Atlanta).

“I was never the most positive thinker leading up to a competition. I’d have all sorts of doubts, fears and insecurities. But I learned that they didn’t affect my performance so I didn’t get too worked up about the fact that I didn’t feel confident.”

(Source: Men’s Fitness, September 2011)


Evidence of Quadrant 4 qualities: His HIGH MEANING about his purpose, his intended outcome and capability enabled him to “learn” how to brush aside his doubts, fears and insecurities” in order to generate HIGH PERFROMANCE.


  • What new, empowering and robust meaning can you develop to help you “learn” to brush aside any doubts, fears and insecurities that you may have about working out and getting fit?
  • Can these same meanings serve to keep you motivated when faced by the inevitable setbacks? Can they help you “learn” to move over them gracefully while learning their lessons?    


The above can help you create QUADRANT 4, HIGH MEANING, HIGH PERFROMANCE, attitudes and behaviors to realize your fitness and wellness outcomes. It’s the secret of those in the 5% – 10% club, it’s in fact the SECRECT behind every successful endeavor! Do you remember that at the start of this blog, we were questioning for the secret of successful weight loss and muscle gain which could also be applied to almost every area of life? Well, this is it. The Quadrant 4 Neuro Semantics! This is at the heart and soul of Neuro Semantics, which is the heart and soul of peak performance and self actualization. Welcome to a whole new world!        


Have you found the secret yet?


I do hope you enjoy the clip below, an interview with the founder of Neuro Semantics, Dr. Michael Hall PhD on Neuro Semantics. 

Neuro Semantic Interview in New Zealand

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Conrad Rozario is the founder of Alchemy Resources, a cutting edge human potential and peak performance development company based in Malaysia. He has more than 15 years experience in people development from the diverse fields of Sales, Marketing, Customer Engagement and Service, Business Management and Talent Development. He is a Certified & Licensed Neuro Semantics and Neuro-Linguistics Programming (NLP) Trainer from the International Society of Neuro – Semantics, USA, a Master Practitioner in Neuro Semantics and NLP (ISNS, USA) and a Language and Behavior Profiling for Coaching Practitioner. He holds a MBA from Gordon University, Illinois, USA.